I'll admit, I'm a band geek. I have plenty of "one time, at band camp…" stories, and yes, they all end up in sex. What can I say? You get a bunch of socially maladjusted kids together with things you blow into, put your hand in, press down, and slide out and sexual experimentation is bound to ensue.

My eight years of marching band experience (high school and college), sadly, never brought me to participate in a contest like this year's Honda Battle of the Bands. For those not familiar with how a normal HBCU band's halftime routine goes, here's a fairly simple breakdown:

Fanfare: This is when the band comes on the field, and really starts from the moment they emerge from the sidelines or come down from the stands. After they march onto the field (several bands have innovative ways of doing this), they usually play a song with a thunderous tone (read: lots of brass), and all auxiliaries are performing in some capacity (dance girls dancing, majorettes twirling, flag girls doing a routine, etc.). This lasts for about three minutes.

Drill Routine: Normally done in the traditional 8-to-5 way (8 steps to 5 yards) where the band does a number of different formations on the field, often spelling out words, shapes or pictures on the field. Mid-tempo songs are played to make it easier to march and keep in line. This lasts for about two to five minutes.

Concert Formation: The last formation in the Drill Routine which normally ends up in the band facing the crowd in about four or five rows. Slow-tempo songs are usually played with a solo or dance routine thrown in at the beginning. This lasts for about two to three minutes.

Dance Routine: Uptempo songs are played, particularly modern ones. The band usually does a number of group or line dance steps and some choreography. This is also a showcase time for the drum section, accompanied by the sousaphones. This is the longest part of the routine, usually about five to seven minutes depending on the band.

Closing: Usually a repeat of the Fanfare as the band marches off the field. Some bands will throw in a surprise dance routine/breakdown in the middle of their Closing for added show. Takes about three to five minutes total.

And now, the bands.

Savannah State University

You have to give it to the small HBCU bands; while their numbers are few, they more than make up for it in spirit. While their numbers are closer to a high school band, I did feel they had a strong brass section which really shined on "Love Come Down" and "Shame" and brought it on home with "Charlene" in their Concert Formation. The auxiliaries seemed confused and out of place; the color guard wasn't on point the entire show. SSU's drumline Krush Groove had a fairly nice routine, even implementing the old caterpiller crawl routine from shows in the past. I think if they become more cohesive, this will be a band to be reckoned with.

Grade: C

Tuskegee University

Ah, the Crimson Pipers. I remember being in high school and being so envious of their band. They had a trombone section which simply could not be touched by any band in the land. I was glad to see they hadn't let that tradition die. Tuskegee also employed a fantastic announcer, a staple for any reputable band. Their opening was solid and they played to both sides of the house…the only band which did so. The Drill Formation was accompanied by "Rocksteady" and their Concert Formation of Shai's "If I Ever Fall In Love Again" with the drummajor pyramid was awesome. The Dance Routine was tight without being hokey (a common mistake in most dance routines), and their 3-2 remix end sold it for me. This band has always had great energy and a fantastic sound. Keep it up, 'Skegee!

Grade: A

Clark-Atlanta University

Ah, my AUC brethren…I really expected better. With Morris Brown's enrollment somewhere in the double digits and the combined muckery of Morehouse and Spelman into a marching band, CAU's supposed to be the band of the AUC. Still beating their Drumline horse, CAU managed to disappoint me this year with another half-assed show. One of the mistakes of most bands is not having a mix of old school with new school for their musical repertoire. If you play all modern songs, chances are you'll only be playing to about 40% of your audience. There's still a lot of alums who come to the games strictly for the halftime show, so playing the Top 40 might not be the best idea.

CAU started this off wrong with playing Mario's "Let Me Love You" for their Dance Routine and a bunch of other songs I couldn't make out simply because the band was too loud. The auxiliaries were awful also, with the dance girls in this hideous one-piece swimsuit/70's Lola Falana-esque pantsuit monstrosity which reminded me of those old shows where you see man with one half of his person dressed in a tux and the other half in a dress with heels. The Concert Formation was nearly identical to Tuskegee's and would have been good had the audience not just heard this song. The Dance Routine was hackneyed; your classic "fight your band member" schtick added with a unified marching of the band for the Closing. Well, at least the Yin-Yang Twins weren't present like last year.

Grade: D

Langston University

For a small band, this unit impressed me initially. They played "In The Stone" by EWF for their fanfare which was crisp, sharp and excellent. Their bass section really surprised me; it sounded like twice as many people as were out on the field. Unfortunately, it was downhill from here. The Drill Routine had several nice formations, and as they performed their Concert Formation, this is where it broke down. Like CAU, the band played too loud so there was a lot of reverberation. To add to this, there were microphoned singers for the song which could not be heard because of the instruments playing at full volume. As the Dance Routine started and went on, LU continued on the sideshowish trend of carting out the largest members of the band to dance and pop and shake for the crowd's amusement. Because we all know fat people dancing is so funny. Ha. Ha. Ha.

Grade: C-

Virginia State University

This band's routine really showcased their brass section, which played songs like "Weak" and "Fun Fun Fun" with spectacular precision and amazing texture (even though the song started off in the wrong key). The dance girls were absolutely great too, popping and shaking it to "Boogie Oogie Oogie" and getting the whole crowd involved. The Dance Routine was not too long, and the Closing just capped it off. When a band's this good, there's not much you can say except "do ya thang"!

Grade: A

North Carolina Central University

This band gave me goosebumps…there was not one weak part of their entire show. From a strong Fanfare leading into a Drill Formation featuring "My Boo"…the '96 Ghost Town DJ's version. Flashback! Unlike the bands prior, they commanded the entire field; the trombones were loud and crisp, a HARD feat to accomplish; hats off to their section leader, definitely! They utilized numerous formations…words, shapes, pictures…it was excellent. The Concert Formation showed off the talents of the trombone and trumpet section, not to mention the dynamic auxiliaries. The trumpet/trombone duet was absolutely phenomenal, and the dance routine of "Breathe, Stretch, Shake", "1-2 Step", and "Get Back" even had this old codger wanting to get up out his seat and shake a tailfeather. Simply put, this band was AWESOME.

Grade: A+

Alabama A&M University

This band can do no wrong to me. In high school, there was only Alabama A&M when it came down to bands, and then there was everyone else. The Marching Maroon and White did not disappoint this year, although they've ditched some of their old school songs for newer ones in their routine, which left me scratching my head at several parts (good thing EJ was there to help me out on the artists and songs). Aside from having a tight brass section, great drums, and that distinctive polyphonic sound, they had a male fire twirler who turned it OUT. Upon closer inspection, I went to HS with him! And yeah, he was a twirler back then too. The scramble into Dance Formation à la FAMU was an interesting twist and the Closing was solid. Overall, not a disappointment. Bravo.

Grade: A

Bethune-Cookman College

This band was too much, and not in a good way. While they commanded the field much like NCCU, that's where their similarities end. The band had an OK sound and reminded me more of a really good HS band instead of a college band at the Honda Battle of the Bands. Aside from their "14K Gold Dancers" which were dressed in silver suits, the Drill Formation was basic at best, Concert Formation was subdued and weak, and the Dance Routine had about 20 ten-second snippets of popular songs thrown in at the end. A colossal mess. Step it up, folks.

Grade: C-

Prairie View A&M University

This band definitely brought their hometown spirit; there was an entire lower level section in the Dome filled with PVAMU fans, and they certainly only enhanced this band's performance. As last year's winner, they also stepped up their game to show that this small-town band brought a big-city performance which no other band could touch. The drum section (Funk Box) was outstanding with their acrobatics (yes!), and the low brass' renditions of Anita Baker's "Sweet Love" and Gloria Estefan's "The Rhythm Is Gonna Get You" were breathtaking. The dance girls were on point and definitely showed their stuff. This is a band that is not afraid to take risks to show the crowd a good time. This is what HBCU bands need to strive to become.

Grade: A+

Florida A & M University

This band always has a great sound and is a fan favorite year after year. Unlike most of the other bands, I could actually make out every song they played with crystal clear quality. Their Drill Routine and Concert Formations included the songs "Lose My Breath", "My Boo" (another '96 flashback), "Getaway" and "Who Can I Run To?". A large band such as this always commands the field, although I do believe the drums muffled the sound quality at several parts of the performance. The Dance Routine was played out, but they did make up for it with a strong Closing. Good, but not their best stuff.

Grade: B