It's day two as the man outside my window sits perched atop his 350-foot metal crow's nest surveying the city. Meanwhile, reporters and rubberneckers alike have turned the surrounding eateries into all-day watchtowers. Now a north facing seat at Moe's Southwest Grill needs reservations like the Chef's Table at the Ritz-Carlton. McDonald's wireless Internet nook, once littered with homeless people, is now bustling with hipster bloggers, their faces awash in the warm glow of their Powerbooks as every minute and every non-event becomes a serious matter. Tourists expecting to dine at Nava or even a lunch at the Cheesecake Factory are rudely awakened to find scads of people catcalling, waving or brandishing signs reading "Just Jump Already!" and "Where's Ashley Smith When You Need Her?"

The news media will tell you that Carl Edward Roland is on the lam for the murder of his girlfriend. How that drove him to another state and on the top of a 20-story crane is a huge disconnect. It could be a cry for help. He could just want to get some fresh air.

Then again, so did Jennifer Wilbanks. David Blaine wishes he could get press like this with his stunts.

The businesses in the shadow of this stunt are suffering. Some are reporting losses of about half of their customer base. "I sure as hell hope this doesn't roll over into Friday and Memorial Day weekend," said an ESPNZone waiter on the bus this morning. "Nigga need tips." Restaurants that deliver must be hurting the most. I'd imagine that if it weren't for the reporters and the police and firemen, there might not even be that much business. That corridor from Pharr Road to East/West Paces Ferry is one of the main veins in Buckhead. If Roland stays up through the weekend, don't think some disgruntled club owner won't try to get him down because it's Saturday night and there's only 20 people in the place and they're all staff.

And you thought just crime and traffic were bad here.

If I let my imagination run wild, I'd think he's doing this stunt on purpose. Wouldn't that be wild? Disgruntled and fed-up with Atlanta, he decides to pull the ultimate crime and take an entire city hostage. Who would want to pay $50 a pop for Six Flags when you can see the man on the crane for free? Staying up there would clear up the mess that is the Peachtree/East/West Paces Ferry/Roswell road knot. Mexican construction workers get fed up because with no Ovation to work on, there's no paycheck. Rippling out into the surrounding community, news and police helicopters are hovering near the crane constantly, the staccato propeller beat echoing as far down as Peachtree Battle. Under Roland there's a conrete bucket which follows his every move. Attached to it is a loud siren which is supposed to keep him awake. Why not just let his ass fall asleep, drop off, and then catch him in a big stunt cushion?

Shit, make me the chief of police.

Trammell Crow, the owner of the construction site that Roland is over, probably has their marketing team working overtime. The spin rolls off the tongue wonderfully…"Ovation: The Property You'll Die To Get Into!" "Need a custom floor plan? We'll build it around you…literally!" It could happen. Hell, if it were DC, we could just bring in a sniper and get his ass off. Man…what is up in Atlanta? First the courthouse shooting, then a runaway bride and a man sitting high above the city. And we lost the Super Bowl for 2009. The last thing we need is some Florida runaway convict bitching Atlanta to it's knees.

But we're still looking.

Hurry, hurry, hurry…step right up….