Lean in, children. If you’re one of the many unemployed folks out there who are looking for a job and becoming disenfranchised with sending out resumes into the endless void of cyberspace and never getting a response or interviewing left and right but never actually getting an offer, I’m here to give you a little secret. A “by” into the industry, if you will. Want to know the reason why you’re not getting a call back? Here’s why: Employers don’t want good workers.
They want sitcom characters.
Think about it: aren’t some of the people you work with some stone cold fools? Do you ever feel like you’re the only sane one in the joint? If you have, and God forbid if you do, a Micro-Manager type within your workforce, then surely you can see how disturbing it’s been that companies have started to trade out skilled, hard-working employees with ditzy blondes, hyper-masculine men, stunt queens and ballsy yet stupid interns.
I’ve spoken somewhat about Mexican Cher the guy (I think) who sits across from me at work. Sure, the ladies love him and he has constant foot traffic to his cube, but as far as the job he’s doing…well, he sucks. He’s too busy having a good time, flirting up some chick, or doing the chicken noodle soup dance to a group of White folks to even meet his numbers. I don’t think he’ll be here too much longer after the new year, and that’s probably a good thing.
Our interns here are starting to show their asses also. Now at any company, it’s to be said that the intern is…well…lowly. Like a serf on a lord’s plantation, they’re really just there to do the busy work so no one else will have to sully their hands with it. I remember interning for the government and having to do projects which someone else already did the year prior just so I could have something to do each day. Rock On! is the latest in the gaggle of interns from the frou-frou art school to temporarily join our ranks, and this chick is lazy as all get out. She does manage to make my manager laugh though, which I guess is a good thing. But her work is terrible. She doesn’t cross-check websites she designs in IE and FF (I mean really, how do you design a site that looks like shit in both browsers? What did you originally design it using, colorforms?) and has already snapped on a manager for no apparent reason. One of the other interns, Asian with a Phatty complains. all. the. time. He feels he should be doing more than what he’s already been tasked with. He wants more responsibility. He’s still in school, but he wants to be on full time. And he’s only been here for a month and a half. You gotta earn your stripes, kid. Just because you’ve put in a semester or two at a $30,000 a year art school for the educational equivalent of a 99-cent certificate of achievement doesn’t mean your ass is entitled to special treatment above others.
Jesus, now I see where the attitudes of the rest of the Snobbers comes from.
Outside of the design world, I see the rest of the workers here with equal buffoonery. Most of the Black women fall into the “I’m a diva” category, complete with attitudes, eye rolls and lip smacks. The gay men, what few of them are here, are flaming and unapologetic. One of them, Whore-Hey!, will sit at lunch with me and watch the news commenting on how hot the reports look and the sexual acts he’d like to commit to them. Awkward! Not to mention nasty and inappropriate for the workplace. The white males mostly walk around and don’t say anything to anyone, which works well since they’re in the obvious minority around here. The Black dudes are the worst though — when they’re not jockeying for the attention of the aforementioned divas, they’re walking around trying to be all hard and shit. Please…you got a 401(k) just like I do. Yo’ ass is not a thug. Let it go!
Seriously though…look at the people you work with and tell me they’re not some looney toons. At least one of them is, I’m sure. And if not, you’ve been at a job where you’ve encountered them. Who are some of the crazies that you work with?
[tags]jobs, employers, job hunting, characters[/tags]
Sitcom Characters…too true, and if you don’t fit in the role or the box then there is a problem. It will probably always be a problem for me because I can’t fit the stupid mold LOL
i work with a man who has no concept of personal space whatsoever. or knowledge that he is one of the creepiest men alive. he found out a coworkers boyfriend died a few months ago and in the same breath asked her both how she was doing and would she like to go out on a date.
Hmmm, that’s interesting. I was asked to sit on an interview panel when the team leader was out sick. One lady was a strong candidate, spoke well, very polished, great references, all her credentials checked out and everything looked great.
But they ended up selecting the crazy person. The guy came 30 minutes late and didn’t offer any explanation or offer some kind of excuse to justify it. Then during the interview, his cell phone rang and he anwsered it and talked for about 3 minutes to someone making dinner plans.
On the job, he was just as thoughtless and self-centered as he was during the interview, even more so.
So, I do believe that employers don’t want good people. They want psychos.
That’s wild Will. There’s a bunch of cartoon characters working at my job in other departments, fortunately I’m in a relatively good group.
But I feel you on the walking stereotypes.