The job search is back on.

I really don't have any qualms now about working on my resume at work (no one comes by my cube) or ducking into a quiet room for a quick phone interview. I'm not getting any respect, so it's time for me to get the hell on. And to do that, I'm getting my network on.

I remember reading (or hearing) somewhere how like over 80% of the jobs out there aren't even listed – they're found out through networking. This is important for any job seeker, and especially so for Black gay men (particularly in a state where your sexual orientation, whether overt or covert, can get you fired with no questions asked…and race only compounds that). You've gotta get out there and show your face so people know you outside of a resume and a mannerism.

Thing is, my social biorhythm is so weird. There are times when I just prefer to be at home, playing some Wii or writing or lounging on the couch reading a good book and listening to some music and don't want to be bothered. I like the solitude, the time for introspection, and most of all, being cut off from the outside world.

And then there are those times when the outside world is a-calling and I want to be around and with people. They're few and far in between, but when they happen, they come quick and hard.

I was speaking with Buffy the other day about this; he's planning on moving back to Atlanta (much to the chagrin of his fiancé) but is skeptical about networking, especially when it comes to ways to start his career. Buffy, while he has a degree in finance from Morehouse, has only managed to get positions as a bank teller since graduating.

"I'm trying to find a real job. I want to start my career. Do you know about any kinda networking events?"

"Well there's sometimes this thing at the the Lotus Lounge…and then I think there's something called Marketing Mondays at the Four Seasons. Oh! And then there's the alumni association."

"But that's stuff for STRAIGHT PEOPLE. I can't believe with Atlanta being the Black gay mecca and all, there's no kind of networking event for Black gay folks!"

I was hard-pressed to retort. After all, straight people need jobs too, right?

As a Black young professional, I somehow get on the invite list to several of these consonance weekday-named quasi-"networking" events (First Fridays, Third Thursdays, etc.), and I've actually been to a few of them. They're usually at some nice, uptown venue, drinks are copious (and sometimes free), and there's a decent selection of talent to look at…but not touch.

To say it's a largely hetero-forced affair would be an understatement.

The last one of these I went to was a few weeks ago at Toast in Midtown. My intent on going was to just have a drink or two after work, a few crostini, and then stumble on home. Nothing major, and definitely no other intentions than those. Well when I walked in, it was like a seventh-grade dance – boys on one side, girls on the other. Girls were checking out the guys, and vice versa; eventually the two crowds mixed, with most women I chatted with more interested in flirting than networking. The questioning usually went something like this:

"Hi, I'm Karsh. It's nice to meet you."

"Hi Karsh, I'm Tamela. Where do you work?"

"Big Company, Inc. I'm a web designer."

"Oh nice…do you have a girlfriend?"

"No…"

"Why not? You gay or something? Huh?"

STOP. See what I mean? Already leading a brotha down that precarious slope. I remember one of these kinda events I was at a few years ago when I just dropped the hard G on a chick and she went bat-shit, telling other women (who started giving me nasty looks) and men (who immediately backed a few inches away from me if I walked in their direction).

"Girl, I ain't think there was gonna be any FAGGOTS up in here…"

"Nah man, I don't get down with that gay shit…"

Real classy, young "professionals". But back to Buffy.

"So there's like no young Black gay professionals group or something?"

"Not to my knowledge. I know there's AEN, but it's not strictly Black and gay."

"So I guess when I move down there, me and my husband gon' just be sitting up in the house, occasionally searching the want ads and eating beans and weenies."

"Geez, you make it sound so bad."

"I just thought that by now there'd be something for us down there."

"Look, I'm not saying there's not. I just hadn't found it if it does exist."

Buffy's convo did get me to thinking. What is there for young Black gay professionals down here in terms of networking events?

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