OK, so last night, I had a date with this guy I met online (don’t worry — it wasn’t Craigslist). We’ve been chatting it up via e-mail for the past week now, and our schedules finally matched up for us to meet.
We went to Downtown Decatur and had food and drinks at Eddie’s Attic (normally not my type of place, but my date made it tolerable), and then more drinks at Brick Store Pub. We had a blast throughout the evening, parted ways with a favorable kiss (which he initiated), and he extended an invitation for me to meet with him on Wednesday for a weekly Project Runway party with his friends. Today, after work and some shopping, I texted him saying I was looking forward to meeting up tomorrow and that we should chat tonight to discuss the particulars. Here’s what I get in return:
Whoa whoa whoa – somebodys moving too fast lol i think we should probably slow things down way down way way down
Weird, yes. But two minutes later, I then get this:
Sorry man just not a match for me im afraid. i had a lot of fun last night though; you’re super cool but just not for me
Really? Wha’ happened here, folks?
[tags]gay dating, atlanta, wtf, no seriously wtf[/tags]
sorry…dude’s just not that into you. something you did must’ve turned him off. or maybe he hooked up with someone else right after you guys parted company and decided that guy was a better invitation to his project runway party. either way, just another one to scratch off the list. keep it moving…
jnez, i agree about the ultimate verdict, but a simple “sorry dude. gotta cancel.” would have sufficed if that was the case.
this dude just assumed a whole bunch o’sh*t that may or may not have been (and i’d guess PROBABLY WANS’T) there.
i doubt karsh is heartbroken over it and yeah, he should keep it moving. but really, those text messages would have made me say WTF? and i would have sent a text back with “after these text messages, i agree this ain’t a match. peace homie.”
Man, I feel for you. That’s behavior is beyond janky. I wish I had some advice for you, but I’m afraid my luck with the dudes seems to be on par with this joker. All that being said, hope springs eternal, my friend. And look at it this way: At least you can cut your losses now and not sweat heartbreak six months into something that wasn’t meant to be.
Good riddance. At least he was upfront. Take it and run with it. Hours saved for more productive activities.
Some people are out there playing games trying to get some quick sex and hit it. You did right by not doing anything more than that kiss. Maybe that shouldn’t occurred until the next time. Do you feel jolted by this?
@hiram: Well it was a first date; I generally don’t do anything more than that, regardless of the chemistry. I don’t feel jolted about it; it just seemed weird how quick he flipped it on me. Not to mention the bitch move of rejection via text message. Such is life though; I’m already moving on with new prospects.
Sounds like he was not willing to get to know you better and as @jnez said, “he is not really into you.” Which makes me wonder why he first sent that text message saying slow down then he said the second one saying he was moving on. Don’t fret. Someone better is out there for you! [@karsh]
Karsh, the toxic date did you a favor. Try not to drink on your dates so you can see these guys in a sobering light. I think the drink(s) are clouding your better judgement and you’re getting your feelings hurt when the next day brings out the true nature of the “he’s just not that into you” guy.
Moon Unit hit the nail on the head.
Alcohol is to blame. I knew plenty of these types when I was an undergrad. Mofos only had convo for you when they were drunk, but the next day, in their sober state, they would act like they never met you.
All the “he’s just not that into you” comments are banal and insufficient. Ultimately there may be a lack of interest, but no one honed in what was the factor that caused the sporadic behavior except Moon.
Just like drinking and driving don’t mix, drinking and first dates don’t mix. Leave the alcohol on the shelf. It’s one less thing you have to worry about. There are already too many unknown elements in the dating equation so don’t go adding libation.
something about that seems “off” to me.